Pic for my Mom

This entry is solely to allow my mom to have access to a picture she wants.

Awed by milestones

When you have a child with Down syndrome, one of the things you start doing is celebrating every little milestone. There is a line in the movie The Incredibles (great movie btw) about how having a graduation at each grade is celebrating mediocrity. While I agree that celebrating a graduation for each grade is ridiculous, I don't agree that it is celebrating mediocrity or that celebrating each goal achieved is a bad thing when every one is going to have a different amount of effort to achieve those goals. I like it when things come easy to my girls, but I love it when I see them working hard at something to do it. I think one of the reasons that parents of children with Ds celebrate every little thing is because our kids work so hard to accomplish each little thing that other children most often come to without a second thought.

Darth Baby is five days old now and I'm discovering that I am going to find joy at all her little milestones, too. For my previous pregnancies, my milk was there already when I gave birth. With the nerdlet, the first time I pumped I got 5 ounces. With this pregnancy, it took longer. I could express colostrum, but I would get practically nothing when I pumped. I was using the same technique of feeding Darth Baby and then pumping, but she was still always hungry and for the first two days we were giving some formula to supplement (because of the GD and the worry that her blood sugar would drop as it was borderline in the low 50s). When we took her in to her first doctor's appointment Saturday morning, she had her first non-meconium diaper and it was seedy and looked just like a breast milk diaper is supposed to. If you had ever told me that I would be so happy over a diaper, I would not have believed it.

Now at day five, I'm watching Darth Baby work so hard to lift her head and turn it back and forth and I can't tell you how it moves me. The bear cub is really warming up to her younger sister and was making happy noises and clapping while her sister was doing it. I took a bunch of pictures and only managed to get a few with her head actually off the ground.


The nerdlet is really enamored of her new sister and keeps telling anyone near her, including Daddy, Grandma, and me to be careful and gentle with her. She brings her blankets and tries to sneak her toys and food. The bear cub is getting much better. For months, I've been signing baby at her and telling her we were going to get one and trying to prepare her only to get blank eyes back. Today, she signed baby for the first time and started patting Darth Baby while saying, "Bah, bah, bah." It was so stinking cute.

The Birth Story

Even though it was my longest labor, it was probably my easiest labor. I arrived at the hospital promptly at 6 am as instructed, but the orders from the doctor hadn't arrived. This didn't really surprise me as I have seen my OB's nurse enter blood work orders walked down to the lab and had them disappear somewhere into the void and Q has commented on every birth about the poor design of the hospital's computer system. They put me in a room anyway, did the calibrated finger test, and got me hooked up to the machine. I was 70% effaced and still only around 2 cm dilated, but the machine showed that I was having regular contractions. The nurse asked me didn't I feel the tightening and I had, but I had dismissed them as contractions as there was really no pain to them. My doctor arrived at 8:30 am and got the orders in the system. It took a little while from then to put in the IV and get the pitocin started, but I was finally started on pitocin at 9:45. The OB said he was going to let me progress a little before breaking my water and left. I asked for an epidural around noon. I have been through one labor with and one without and already knew that I had no pride regarding having the pain reduced for an induction, which I feel is at least 10 times more painful than natural labor. The anesthesiologist was great, but he ended up cutting off all feeling and I had to ask him to back off because I was worried about pushing. With the nerdlet, I had had an epidural, but it hadn't cut off the feeling or the pain, just the edge. The OB finally returned to break my water at 12:30 pm. The nurse proclaimed me close to fully dilated just before 3 pm and started to set up the room. By the time the room was set up, she said I was ready and called the OB and asked me to start pushing with the next contraction. After two contractions, she told me not to push so hard until the OB got there or I would deliver, and after the next push, she told me to stop pushing altogether. It seemed pretty funny to me that I was expected not to push and I started laughing. She then told me that I was going to laugh the baby out if I didn't stop and the OB walked in glanced at me and practically sprung into the chair, told me to push again, and caught Darth Baby as she came out at 3:39 pm. So four contractions was much nicer than the hours of pushing it took for the nerdlet's giant head, but not as nice as the single contraction for the bear cub.

They immediately handed her to me, which was really nice. They hadn't done that with my first two. Even though she was the largest of the three at 7 pounds 4 ounces and 19 1/2 inches, she looks much smaller to me. She curls herself up more and her head is smaller than her sisters. She isn't anywhere near as alert as I am used to and she sleeps all the time as long as someone is holding her. It is so different for me to experience a baby that fits the descriptions you read in books.

I really dislike lactation consultants, but the one that I saw immediately after the birth took the cake. She started handling me and the baby right off without giving me time at all to get comfortable. Then she kept commenting on how heavy my breasts were and actually said that she didn't understand how I could even stand up. What??? Darth Baby had a great latch and took to feeding right off, but in the few days since the birth my breasts have gotten bigger and heavier and don't squish enough to feed after all. I was really looking forward to being able to breast feed directly with this one, but it looks like I'm going to have to exclusively pump again. She eats like a champ though and it likely going to be like the nerdlet when it comes to food. She is already eating close to 20 ounces/day and my milk is still mostly colostrum. I'm great with this though as I had a really hard time with the fact that the bear cub never seemed interested in eating. I also think that Darth Baby has already regained her birth weight as she is heavier weighed with diaper and onesie, but I haven't weighed her naked yet.

They released us both Friday evening and Q and I were so glad to be leaving. They call it cabin fever and I really felt like I had been trapped in a small cruise cabin for the time I was there. The hospital is really luxurious and the rooms are so nice and clean, but I definitely felt more trapped than I had in the past. I also missed my girls terribly. The nerdlet has taken really well to Darth Baby and she is constantly telling us to be careful and gentle with her, and whenever the baby is in her reach, she brings a blanket to put over her and gives her kisses and hugs. The bear cub has moments of excitement over her and moments of disdain, but for the most part, she seems indifferent. I think she mostly just wishes the baby would stay out of daddy's arms.

Not even close to Wordless Wednesday

By this time tomorrow, I should be holding Darth Baby in my arms. I'm a little scared because although I know that at this point it is safer to have her than to let her continue on, I am not sure that my body is ready to give birth. I'm scared of a C-section. I haven't had surgery before and I am a little worried about the possibility. I'm also feeling a bit burdened because there is a lot of bad news with family and friends with death and sickness. I am hoping that I can keep my mind clear and focus on the task at hand tomorrow and my new baby.

I have my first piece by the bear cub that I plan to frame. It is almost completely her own work and I'm really pleased with how it came out.

Here is a picture of the girls working.


And a picture of the final masterpiece.


And a picture of the artist after a bath playing dress up.


The nerdlet named her picture dinosaur eggs. I found this interesting because I'm not really in the habit of asking her what she is painting or to tell me about it, but she volunteered the information.

Darth Baby Name Rejects

Q and I are still undecided on a middle name for Darth Baby. I thought I would share some of the rejected names.

1.Maleficent
Maleficent is the name of the coolest Disney Villain ever. She is the witch that cursed Sleeping Beauty. We have a number of overlaps of names in our family with characters in the movie, and it would be apt as we called the nerdlet Attila and the bear cub Genghis prior to choosing names for them.

2.Araceli
I love this name. I've liked it since I first heard it as the name of the first woman to climb Mount Everest. I wanted to name both the nerdlet and the bear cub Araceli, but Q feels that giving an ethic name to our very fair children wouldn't be right. Also, Q's family is not good with unfamiliar names in either remembering them or spelling them. If Q doesn't answer his phone when I go to deliver the baby I may use this one anyway.

3.Drop Table
This is a nerd joke. It is a command that would mess up any data tables that her name was entered into. Q thinks it's really funny.

4.Novela names
My mom loves and has suggested on multiple occasions that we name Darth Baby or the bear cub Mari-Chuy (short for Maria Jesus - pronounces Heh-Suess) after a favorite character of hers in one of the telenovelas. I think it's cute enough, but not really right for us even without the fact that my children are all pan crudo (doughy - a nickname my mom and grandma used to use for me).

5.Grandmother's names
I'm jealous of people that have grandmothers to name their daughters of. Between Q and I, we have the following choices from our grandmothers:
Phyllis
Wilhelmina
Elvira
Estefana
I actually like Estefana, especially the white version Stephanie, but it isn't an option because we have a close relative with that name and as Q's brother, father, and grandfather all share the same name, we are so not going down that path.

Pictures

Little Miss helped the nerdlet and Grandma with the houses, but she of little attention span was gone by the time I got the camera out.


"It was totally worth sitting through the combing out of my awful tangles for the colors in my hair. Next time I want pink and yellow." The last sentence is an exact quote.


"Mom, I had to do something while you were busy and the nerdlet's paint box looked like so much fun."

Christmas Traditions

Ours being a relatively young family, we don't have any Christmas traditions as of yet. Also, although I grew up in a Catholic household, we didn't really have any traditions outside of the advent cycle in church. I just read this and I think it is a great tradition to start. For the link phobic, you take 25 children's books and wrap them to put under the tree and open one to read each night. I'm going to start looking for Christmas and winter books to use.

I would love it if anyone has any Christmas traditions that they would like to share with me.